2018

18.1.18

Beautiful date. Beautiful weather. Beautiful day to write a blog πŸ™‚

Since it is still January, I would like to wish Happy New Year. Hope 2018 will be a great year to all of us. Spent the new year at my hometown with my family, simple but blessed. Went back to Penang on 3rd.

I think I started 2018 quite well so far. Trying my best with my PhD thesis, at the same went to Penang Green Agenda Symposium on Sustainability Penang few days ago. Looking forward to keep myself busy this year πŸ˜€

As I turned 26 this July, what I hope for 2018:

a) Finish my PhD

b) Be more positive & happy

c) Good health, for my family as well

d) Great simple life

2018 will be a year where many of my friends getting hitched, so should I say 2018 is the year of love? πŸ˜‰

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Quarter Life Crisis

The quarter life crisis is a period of life ranging from twenties to thirries, in which a person begins to feel doubtful about their own lives, brought on by the stress of becoming an adult (Source: Wikipedia)

Here I found 10 signs you are having a quarter life crisis by lifehack.org. So let’s check on whether I have a crisis or not.

a) You suddenly fell like your job is a prison cell and you need to escape

  • I do not have a job right now

b) You daydream about your life when waiting in line for coffee

  • I did it while waiting for my nasi, and whenever I have time, since forever ! πŸ˜€

c) You get anxious scrolling throught Facebook posts about weddings and pregnancies

  • Not really

d) You realize you have nothing in common with friends from High School any more

  • Maybe. They have their own awesome life

e) You do something you’ve always wanted to try, but never had the guts to go through with (like join a dance or yoga class)

  • I do want to go to yoga class again but….Β 

f) You stay in on a Saturday night and don’t feel like you’re missing out on anything

  • I spend my Saturday night by sleeping

g) You freak out whenever someone asks you to commit something a year away

  • I freak out when my supervisor give me deadlines

h) You can’t understand why you’re still not happy, despite all of your achievements

  • I don’t think I have lots of achievements

i) You start noticing everyday things that you’ve never noticed before

  • I’ve done this since forever. Just either I speak about it out loud or just keep it to myself

j) You have realized there’s no such thing as perfect

  • Until my supervisor told me that the sky is not the limit, just focus on the surroundings. Because I have always not satisfied with whatever work that I present to her.

It Just Me

4 months passed by, and here I am again. Well, hello again πŸ™‚

I’ve just realised that I haven’t tweet a lot lately. I think I’ve lack of idea to write or type on my social media. So do on my blog, and my thesis ! Took me two minutes just to type a tweet just now. It’s because my life is quite boring right now and I be extra careful on what I post to the public.

I do post on Instagram because it just pictures, but still it took me few minutes or hours just to write a caption or end up I just post my photo without a caption lol. Sometimes I took days to think whether I should post a photo or not. Is this a part of quarter life crisis or I’m having mental issue πŸ˜›

As mentioned earlier (why on earth I write like on my thesis??), my life is still quite boring right now, but I try my very best to always be positive and keep myself busy πŸ™‚

Just some random post. Hope I have something interesting to blog soon !

25

Hello, blog !

Honestly, I missed blogging but still with same excuse, I have nothing to write :/

I was at home past two months, fasting and celebrate Hari Raya with my family. Better late than never, SELAMAT HARI RAYA MAAF ZAHIR BATIN ! πŸ˜€

Spend my time at home doing work, watched TV (I don’t have TV at my hostel 😦 ), eat A LOT, shopping (I love this), hang out with friends (a few) and went for holiday with my family. Spent first three days of Raya at Malacca and 4 days in Sabah for my birthday. Turned 25 18 days ago πŸ˜€

I still can’t believe I will be 25 this year. Way before this I thought when I turn 25 I am going to have a good job and great life, everything good come at 25. Allah knows best, I am still a student and my life is great Alhamdullilah. He is the greatest so I strongly believe in His plans.

As for now, what I wish for this birthday:

  1. A better me
  2. Good health for me & family
  3. Finish my Ph.D as soon as I can, have a great career to bring more happiness to my family especially my parents
  4. A good mate

 

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Hello 25-year-old me ❀

 

 

Straight and Connected – NOT

success-straight
Source: Google image

Actually, this is what inside my brain (refer to right picture).

Currently in my fourth semester and there is a lot of thing I need to improve. Met my supervisor yesterday to discuss my latest draft and still there is a lot to change. Β Honestly, I was so nervous everytime submitting my drafts and I am always not satisfy with my drafts but I need to show it to my supervisor so she will know my progress. In the end, I will say to myself “It’s okay, you can’t keep your drafts and change it forever”.

She told me somehow I have what I want to write or tell in my mind but I am not expressed it on the paper. With additional comments on my draft (lots of purple ink, now I think my mind is worst than the picture on the right, not straight and brain cells not connected with each other. I think I need to clear my mind and Alhamdullilah the weather is sooooo awesome now πŸ™‚

Hopefully I can think better and get some ideas soon !

Rock Bottom

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Well, hello blog? Haha.

Haven’t post anything past few months just because I have nothing to share or write. In other word, I have no idea what to write about. Maybe all in my mind is what to write in the thesis draft to show to my supervisor. Really a permanent head damage.

Few days ago, I came across this tweet, by one of my favourites, Alicia. This tweet reminds me of people asking me why am I so positive or so strong in handling some situations. Actually, I am not, but I have no choice. There is up and down in life and we have to face it and go on with our lives. That’s what I do all this while. I don’t think I need to show to the whole world how I was, except for few people who realise without me having to tell them. So yeah, just look forward and be positive for the future.

Another new issue coming in: I am too comfortable being alone. Do I look like that? πŸ™‚

Up & Down

Read Vivy’s latest postΒ and I’m totally agree with what she wrote.

Back then (since my degree time), I was (and still am)Β trying my best to be positive even sometimes I failed. However, nowadays I realised that somehow I am not as positive as I am before.

I am truly grateful to have a very wonderful family. A very supportive father, caring mother and perfect brother. Everything is good until I was in high school where most of people there are against me, because of who I am. Being in the highest post for a student doesn’t make me looks good enough to them, except for few people who support me. Thank you for that. Things getting worst when I didn’t score well in my SPM. Since then, I left, never look back and continue my life.

Went to matriculation college for a year. Decided to not being like how I did during high school, only focus to get good grades. Had tough (pack schedule and away from home) but wonderful life there with such great friends (still bff to Shaliha), and Alhamdullilah I did quite well in my exams, make me eligible to pursue my degree in USM.

Did my degree, masters, work for few months and doing Ph.D, I still feel good until last year, the negative vibes came again and it’s worst than before. Eventhough I’m currently move on (around 95% I guess) but somehow when I was alone (sometimes) those things came across my mind. It is not good especially when I bump into or hear about those #%!%#! . Sometimes I am okay, sometimes I am not. Once, twice maybe okay.

How I wish I can talk to Bahirah the way when she was doing her intern. How I wish my bebi boys are here always to make me forget those negative vibes. How I wish C&W are not busy and can look at me and say “You don’t have to say anything. We know” They really know.

Well, time passes and the only thing I can do now is to be a better me, a more positive me πŸ™‚